I’ve fallen into a rut lately. I would rather sit on my behind and watch TV than do the things that I should be doing, like writing, working out, cooking for myself, going to the store…basically all of the things that adulting requires, I want nothing to do with it.
But I don’t want nothing to do with it, I don’t want to sink back into that depressive cocoon where the TV and my fuzzy blankets lull me into the tempting thoughts of “It’s OK, you don’t have to do that, someone else will do everything for you”. This voice is a lie, no one is going to take care of my responsibilities because, well, they’re mine.
So how does one get out of ruts like this?
First and foremost, you have to catch yourself in the spiral. The spiral being those ever so helpful thoughts that if you really actually think about them, anxiety will spike and the instinct to hide comes creeping through your body like a vine crawling up a building. Very subtly getting taking over more and more of your mind.
What thoughts are triggering the anxiety? What thoughts triggered the depression? When you are happy and suddenly feel yourself becoming anxious or depressed, what are the thoughts surrounding those emotions?
Talk yourself up
Feeling like this is natural. We’re not perfect, sometimes we will get anxious, sometimes we will get depressed and that’s ok. It’s ok to acknowledge it to yourself, it’s healthy actually. Don’t beat yourself up if these feelings overwhelm you, you’re only human and life can be stressful. Allow yourself to break down and feel whatever you need to feel, but remind yourself that this isn’t who you are and you have the power to change what hurts you. You have the right to be happy and the ability to handle whatever it is that’s bothering you.
You decide when the depression stops. You decide when the anxiety no longer has a hold on you. You have the power over your own mind which changes your brain which controls your body. YOU are the master and YOU CAN DO IT.
My demons lie in the fact that I don’t really have any food in the house for dinner. I need to eat because I need to maintain my weight (My metabolism is just way to darn fast). I need to go to the store because I am worth a healthy, home cooked meal. That healthy, home cooked meal is not only going to feed me today, but it’s also going to be my lunch tomorrow so that’s double incentive to get off my lazy arce and head to supermarket.
Demon number two lies in the fact that I didn’t write a post last week and it’s taken me this long to write the post for next week. Last week I unfortunately had a migraine the day that I had set aside to write which meant that I could barely open my eyes for 24 hours let alone stare at a computer screen. It’s understandable and nothing to beat myself up over because life happens, we can’t control that. What we can control is our reaction to it so I am choosing to no longer react by sinking into a depression, I am taking steps to alleviate the cause of the stress. If I’m stressed over the fact that I haven’t written yet, I better get to writing. You get the picture.
Last but not least, I will find something to be grateful for. I am so very grateful for the opportunity to express myself through writing. My heart is over filled with joy and gratitude when I think about all of the doors writing has opened and all of the demons it has caged. I am truly blessed to be able to use words to do such wonderful things and so very blessed to be able to share that with the world.